What You’re Googling: These Aren’t the Droids You’re Looking For

2 05 2007

I’m aware that this is usually a slow-news-day filler, but we’ve had some really delightful search engine results in the last week. In case anyone’s wondering how people get pointed here by Google, or what-have-you, join me, won’t you? I’ve left out the Certified Relevant/Irrelevant meme; sorry.

Twice in the last week, someone found us by searching for You asked for it, you got it, Toyota. Which, weirdly, we’re 6th in the queue, behind the actual advertising quotes. I didn’t expect anyone to be looking for that, but maybe they actually were quoting Forget Paris, in which case – I’m more sorry than I can express. The actual post in question? Headline joke in one of our early Power Rankings thinghies.

Also enjoyable? How to be a great quarterback. Good luck, young man (lady?), but to be clear: we have no idea. I’m less than 5’6″, which sort of crippled those aspirations, and while I hesitate to impugn my co-editor,I’m sure he’ll readily admit the only time he’s a good quarterback is on the XBox [Co-editor’s note: I blame poor play from this year’s snow football games to throwing while wearing WR gloves, but in reality, I really don’t stand much of a chance of matching the greatness of my Madden ’07 rookie QB avatar, who was drafted by the Bills and single-handedly led them to the playoffs]. Also, we blog about the ARENA Football League. So, you’re way off. (Clint Dolezel – the eventual destination of this search – excepted) But the idea of – let’s pretend – Chet Lemon saying to himself “I want to be a great quarterback, but how? I know! I’ll Google it!” and then running to his computer makes me giggle. 

does investment banks bet on football Hahahahahaha.

Kurt is my homeboy. How nice for you.

somebody I know played with the Hooters, ooh, really? We can talk about that, if we ever set up the It’s Still Football tipline.

Some of the hits we’ve received from people searches make sense: Mike Adamle, Ricky Santos, David Carr, and Mike Golic, even Trey Wingo and Bootsy Collins are people we’ve mentioned. But Aaron Esurance? Is that the Esurance dude? Is it Aaron and Erin? That’s even dumber than I originally thought those commercials were. Oh, but we did get a hit for Brett Basanez video. You’re welcome, Coach Cameron. We know you’re having trouble at quarterback.

As always, there are the mysterious jai-alai -yarn -savant searches that just defy all logic. How did you end up here? Yarn Savants? What are those? We did manage to mentionjai-alai briefly in one of my ramblings, so there’s that…  Also, I want to know the end of this search: The reason the Barcelona Dragons wer. Were what? Hungry? Angry? Logy? Wearing Togas? Relocated? (I know the answer to that one – nobody outside Germany gives a crap about NFL Europa.)

Well, whatever the case may be, and whatever brought you, we certainly hope to continue to be your source for an angry bobcat, as well as for bootys.




One response

2 05 2007
J Fizzle

Funny enough, I used the “You asked for it. You got it” because of Forget Paris. That’s one of my favorite parts of that whole movie.

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