Week 13 Power Rankings, Pillow Fights, and Picks: 4-8 is good enough

I also don’t want to live in a world where a 4-8 team is a playoff contender.

I’m looking at you, Columbus, Kansas City, Los Angeles, Utah, Grand Rapids, and Colorado. Y’all are more inept at (indoor)(goofy) football than Sharon Stone is at displaying tact, or, for that matter, sanity. You suck more than the 21-day detox I’m starting tomorrow (shameless plug: keep up with that over here). You’re not even Zeppo Marx, you’re Gummo. Check in with us when you’ve won more than the 49ers did last season, mmmkay?

You know the drill: after the jump, ESPN’s Gary “Grampastein” Horton arbitrarily rates every team in the league, I’ll throw down a completely random and certifiably unreliable pick for your arena football betting needs, and a declaration of the worst matchupof the week (this week, it is glorious, even without the President’s daughters).

Arena Bowl XXII to feature Miss America; perhaps football

So far as we can tell, she’s no relation to kicker/lesbian schmoozer AJ Haglund, although she does have the shapley smooth legs of a punter

It’s official: Miss America 2008, Kirsten Haglund, will be a part of the Arena Bowl XXII festivities.

We’re getting early reports that to help spread her message about the danger of eating disorders, Haglund will consume a turduckenwith Commissioner Monstrosity/Easter Island Stone-Throwing Champ David Baker prior to kickoff.