Can’t Miss Random Pick Victory Party!

All hail the CMRP! I’ll wait for you to finish hailing.

Okay, are we good? On to the weekend’s combat.

Dallas 59, PHILADELPHIA 56. Hey, look: Dallas wins in a squeaker. To continue the refrain, Dallas and Dr. Dolezel are in a class by themselves, but if the right things come together, a good team (Georgia and the Graziani-led Soul are about it in their conference) could pull the upset. Watch the New York game on June 16th - it has the potential to be a really interesting QB duel. Of course, at that point, Dallas might be resting everybody as they coast to the playoffs. Also notable: Will Pettis of Dallas, getting an interception and four touchdowns while also returning kicks. If Philly had pulled off the onside kick with :53 remaining, this could’ve been a shocker, but otherwise Dallas was just too much for the Soul.

SAN JOSE 59, Orlando 52. San Jose continues to win with the “Run? Surely you must be joking” strategy, which I’ve gotten behind because it strikes me as so absurd. If you’re curious, they tried 5 rushes for a total of 2 yards, including 1 1-yard TD. I’m delighted, and not just because I’ve adopted San Jose until they come up against the Unstoppable (With Bobby Sippio) Rush in the playoffs. Oh! Orlando DL Greg White set the single-season sack record, notching his 14th. That’s particularly notable, because, well: defense! Records! Greg eat quarterback! 

Oops, I forgot the jump. Here: